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So You’re Stuck in a Cozy Mystery: A

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But when you enter, the normally chatty barista has no beans to spill, and the other patrons

Regina, the bookseller, is always up for a long chat about local events and politics

Surely, she’ll explain the change that has come over the town

Instead, you see only a fleeing shadow and a body on the ground

Perhaps a camera to photograph the crime scene? Or a notebook to take down your observations? No?

Listen, if you’re planning a life of amateur sleuthing, you’re going to have to be

I’m partial to a cape, such as the wool one Margaret Rutherford wore when she portrayed

Of course, you can use whatever bag you think is handy, but please, pack some kind of

I know they call it amateur sleuthing, but that doesn’t mean you won’t need to

Three hours a week until you can pop a lock silent as the night

A nice heavy one can do double duty — yes, obviously that is what I mean

You’ve heard of Cain’s Jawbone? It’s a ghastly difficult puzzle

For something a bit lighter, perhaps to stay sharp during a stakeout, you might try another kind

This one pays homage to the queen while giving you clues to find

Practice looking quizzically at the pieces while you’re really eyeing that suspect across the room

I’m not sure what 10x magnification is going to do for you in the field, but

Now, you’ll only want to use the teacup if you have the antidote

I hope you take some of my advice to heart! You seem sharp and I think you

Pity I’ll need to use my flashlight here in broad daylight, but now you know what